Food and love. That's all. That's everything.

I love seeing a new mum with her new baby snuggled in her arms. I look at her and I'm a little over-full on emotion and I'm thinking {and probably staring}, "Wow, you amazing woman, you grew, nurtured and birthed this beautiful babe into existence." Wow indeed.

So when I recently spoke with a girlfriend a week after the birth of her first baby, I had all these thoughts and emotions. And more.

And I waited a while before I dared ask how she was doing, you know with the day-to-day and the torture of no sleep, trying to get everything done and adjusting to being truly needed by a little person 24/7. I asked because this is what I wished someone had asked me. And then blown my cover when I gave them a phony answer.

I won't lie. Motherhood was a big adjustment for me. After having my first baby I got lots of comments on how good I looked {thank you}, how cute my baby was {thank you} and that I was doing a great job {thank you}... but inside I was shrivelling a little bit. I was dehydrated {my own fault for not drinking much at all} and low in iron {read: emotional, exhausted, teary} and honestly I felt like I couldn't get everything done {because, well I couldn't!}.

I thought it was going to be easy, and it would all feel natural {especially breastfeeding}. But it didn't all come naturally, and most of it {especially breastfeeding} I was learning on the go. I worried when nothing was getting ticked off my to-do list. I had unrealistic expectations, and put ridiculous pressure on myself. I see that now.

So when I spoke with my beautiful friend, and asked, "How are you feeling?", I got thrown a little. Her reply: "Great. But I'm not doing much." I was confused. Not doing much? Much? I think my muffled reply came out as "Huh?" Her response: "Oh, well I'm breastfeeding, and cuddling, and then breastfeeding again, and cuddling, and breastfeeding, and changing lots of nappies. That's all."

My response to this was perhaps the most surprising element of the conversation: "That's beautiful. Really that's all baby needs, feeding and loving."

Feeds, and loving. Love, and feeding. That's all. That's everything.

I'm left wondering why I couldn't have worked this out say 2.5 years ago, prior to giving birth twice? Because I {hopefully} would have spent the first six weeks of my baby's life doing a whole lot less, but more loving.

I'm also left feeling a little lighter, because my beautiful intuitive new-mum friend has reminded me of what really counts. And that I really don't need to do it all, right this very second.

Elisa xx

{image credit: you can buy the "Love is all you need" artwork here}

Are you good at striking a balance?