Thursday, 22 March 2012

Hide & seek is a hazard. I beg you to say no.

Hide and seek is a freakin' hazard. Yes I know, it's a children's game. And one they love. But this is my warning to you. Don't entertain this game. Never. Don't let your child see it on television, blacklist any family members who show/teach them the game, and while you're at it chuck out those lift-the-flap books.

There really are plenty of other games to play. Try peek-a-boo. The baby's version of hide and seek. Stick with that. Never graduate from it. Nobody ever lost a child who was hiding behind his/her own hands.

Not convinced? Here are my reasons why not to play...
1. Children are very smart. Your child will hone his/her hiding/seeking skills exceptionally well over a few weeks. And will work out how to sneak up behind you ever so softly, and scare the crap out of you. You will become a great source of amusement. Child will get better and better at it. You will be on edge constantly.

Too clever: Hiding under the kitchen sink! {pic by me}

2. Your child will love hide & seek. Too much. You will be asked to play 20 times a day. Play one game, and times that by 10. That should drive you nuts. And if it doesn't, soon your guests will be dragged off to hide before they step voluntarily in your door. If they are childless and your child is insistent, expect them to soon never want to visit you.

3. You will lose your child. In the house. While playing hide and seek. Children have a Macgyver-like technique of deciphering when they're onto something clever. They will find the perfect hiding spot, and don't underestimate their patience. They will hide, and be silent for a long long time. Even when you're frantically calling their name, almost in tears running from room to room searching for said child. Even when you're on the phone to your husband begging him to come home from work and help you look for his lost child... in your house.

Impressive: Almost hidden... {pic by me}

4. You will be injured during hide and seek. Your child will also be injured from time to time. They will bounce back within seconds. You will not.

5. You will start thinking about good places to hide. This is bad news. Because you will think of a great hiding place. When you do, re-read point four above. And in the interests of safety, don't lie under the bed covers. You will get jumped on. And when your husband wants to hide in the bath? This will most likely result in husband exiting the bath with his head stuck parallel to his shoulder. You will laugh. He will recover three days later, after a deep-tissue massage and chiropractic treatment.

Oh, and yes all these events did occur in our home. Learning the hard way... :)

Good luck! Elisa xx

Is there a children's game that drives you nuts? Do tell!


  1. Bahahahaha!

    The husband in the bath situation literally made me laugh out loud! :)

    Thanks for the tips :)

    I don't think I'm ever going to introduce Max to this game ;)

  2. OMG Elisa, you've just had me in tears laughing!!


  3. Whilst I did laugh at this, it is very true what you say. My sisters son hid himself in the washing draw In the laundry and couldn't get out, he could have suffocated to death. when she told me this it scared the shit out of me. Thank God his brother heard his faint cries cos it really could have been devastating. If you have such a drawer warn your kids not to use it. A simple fun kids game can be very dangerous, and as you say they are very inventive.

  4. i certainly laughed. you have a great writing style. hide and seek in our house results in penny hiding in the one place 50 times over. she is so sweet. thank you for dropping by my blog. it is lovely to meet you.

  5. Glad to make you all laugh :)

    @Melissa - that's horribly scary. Luckily, we don't have a laundry drawer like that at our place.

  6. But they are so cute when they do play it!! Great reading Elisa

  7. Elisa, That made me laugh so so hard. On the other hand I did also think of the episode with our sister Melissa. Very scarey at times, but I loved your stories Elisa. Your obviously very talented and I look forward to seeing more! Gin

  8. @Pam - thank you, and true, cute the first 10 times, then... :)

    @Ginni - thank you xx


Thank you for your words and support. I'm so glad you stopped by xx