The longest days

This week has had the longest days I can remember.

The first few days began with my little miss two sick, the last few have had my baby {ten months} sick {and it's the first time she's been unwell}.

There's been a whole lot of cuddling going on plus sleeping in my arms, on my chest and in our my bed {whatever it takes to make them feel better, to feel nurtured and safe}.

We've used hundreds of tissues and slept very little {awake listening to my babies' strained breathing and cradling their tiny bodies close to mine}.

And this morning I pondered grateful briefly {as I tried to spread honey on toast with a baby under one arm and a toddler tugging on the other}.

I didn't feel grateful {I felt exhausted and upset that both my babies were still unwell}.

But I'm an eternal optimist and I knew if I stopped for a second I'd find a lesson learnt in this {exhausting} week.

And tonight just as I had time to stop I scanned over the {untouched} to-do list on my bedside table, and that's when my baby girl woke distraught.

I scooped her up from her cot and cradled her close, brought her to my bed, breastfed her and then watched as she drifted gently into sleep {our eyes on each other until sleep saw hers close}.

And now I'm in bed typing away beside her {listening to her breath, watching the way she sleeps, admiring her long eyelashes and planting the gentlest kisses on her tiny hands}.

And I've looked at that to-do list again {a list with lists} with all my high priorities for this week.

But really none of them are urgent {not a single one}, and none of them have been done {not a single one}. 

And none of that matters {despite Monday's highest concern being ticking off that very list}. 

Because this week {while I've missed sleep and felt mostly dazed and worried} I've done so much nurturing and loving. 

And I've learnt that everything I really want {healthy and happy smiles on my girls' faces} isn't on that list. 

And I realise now that I've learnt a lesson in letting go {surrendering} and living one moment at a time.

And next week I won't need a reason to dismiss that to-do list. To stop and do nothing but nurture and love my babies.

Because that's everything to me, and I think that's everything to them too.

Elisa xx

{Grateful for the lessons learnt in the most trying weeks with the longest of days ~ Linking with Kidspot's 52 Weeks of Grateful.}


How has your week shaped up? Have you found something to be grateful for?