Clarity

Last year felt murky, messy and ferocious. I struggled processing emotions, and I held on too long when I could have been letting go. At times it felt like I was submerged, other times fighting to stay afloat, all the while consumed by the necessary and emotion-processing, struggling to be free.

But I got there. Though all that muck. And I broke every rule I had created for myself along the way. And I began thinking that the reason I had arrived at this place of resentment and isolation, was perhaps because of all these "rules" I created in the first place.

Last week, with the kids back at school, I went to the sea solo with a plan to swim. The weather was warm but mild and the humidity high, the sky clouded over and the sea looked murky, messy and ferocious - just like my past year. 

My first thought on arriving was how beautiful the sea is, no matter what mood it shows up in on any given day. 

My second thought? I don't swim on cloud-cover, big-wave days. And then I caught myself touting rules again, and wondered when I made up that one. Time to break it, was my next thought.

And so I dived in. And swam solo for thirty minutes, letting the waves push me back into shore. Letting go of any thoughts I was holding on to. And I felt free. Clear, lighter, supported and free.

And that one swim, despite being a month into the year, felt a lot like me giving myself permission to begin again.

To take charge and see ideas become actions.
To break more rules that, on second thoughts, didn't even serve me that well when they were created.
To write, and actually hit publish.
To freely be me, and to simply just be. 

Clarity. It took jumping into a cold and windy sea to get me there. 

xx

Here's to writing and sharing here much much more! How are you? What are your plans for this year? And are you a rule-breaker? Elisa xx

I keep coming back to here

I keep coming back to here. Every day if I can. At least five times a week of late. 

The sea reminds me to breathe full breaths. It brings me back to my breath. To one single breath. 

It reminds me that each moment is precious. And to feel all of me in this very moment. Not to think of yesterday's moments or tomorrow's. This moment. And then the next.

When I stand here with the sea, I feel all the more alive. Because here I am mindfulness. Sometimes only for a handful of minutes. Sometimes I'm afforded a whole lot more. But presence, regardless of the time limit, is what makes the difference.

I'm sharing today a round up of images of the sea I've taken in recent weeks. 

Notice how each is so different? Notice how the colours of the sea change each day? As does it's rhythm. 

I've tried to capture the beauty of the sea in my photos, yet none are similar and different aspects have stood out to me each day. 

Each time I pause to observe the sea, I find myself acknowledging how it presents on this day, connecting with its rhythm and giving thanks for it. I never judge the sea. I find beauty in the sea despite its actions, despite its rhythm, despite its appearance. There's a lesson in there. And it's so very applicable to me. 

As I breathed in the sea air this morning, I gave thanks for the me that simply showed up today. I gave thanks with gentleness, kindness and a loving heart. Without judgement. And realised this space feels new to me. 

So here I stand, committing to loving me better. Unconditionally. Stepping into my own power. With big nourishing sea breaths as encouragement. And as a reminder that this moment, this breath, right now is always the perfect time to begin. Again. 

xx

Do you love the sea too? Is my lesson a lesson for you? 

What actions do you take to nurture your heart and soul? To love your whole self better?
I'd love to know. Elisa x

>>>>> See here for what's included in my free mindfulness bundle, which is quite a bit and is looking a bit more mini-ebook worthy than bundle right about now..! I can't wait to share it with you! It includes a bundle of mindful ways + words + activities to encourage you to easily connect with your heart + the power of your amazing life breath. And next month it will launch! I'm just putting the pretty touches on it now :) Elisa x

A nourishing something

Yesterday I had a conversation about how having a ritual {or a nourishing something that's just for us} that we do each day can be the one thing that keeps us feeling filled, not just going but going happily, with that little bit of extra energy (even when sleep alludes you). Of course, we can go quite wonderfully without that little nourishing rhythm in our day too - but it can make all the difference on some days. 

My time by the sea with my camera, notepad and pen has been a weekly dose of nourishment for me this year. It's most often meant solo time too, before I begin work. And lately it's been just a handful of minutes that it's taken to fill my heart and soul, to recharge and take stock. Perhaps I needed more time in the beginning, but lately it's been so much less - and I think that's because this has become a ritual; helped by the fact that I now effortlessly {no guilt} grant myself this time each week to just be. Just as you get better at something when you practice it, I think you get better at tuning in, letting go, relaxing and reconnecting by creating a weekly/daily space for it too. 

xx

Do you do something each day or weekly that's just for you? Something to nourish your body or heart or soul?

{~ Finally catching up on sharing this year's photo project - weekly images by the sea. Above are images 26-33 and one extra! Elisa x}

Escape

After writing these words, we decided a little escape down the coast would be the perfect way to reset our pace. And a new rhythm we found. One that's left us recharged, and filled up on the joy that is being together with no real agenda for the day. Miss four wanted a journal of sorts of our three days away to show her family and friends; these are a few of the photos {snapped with my phone!} that tell the story of our time away. Just us, simple days, exploring new places, sharing laughter, love and time.  

xx

{Also pic 34 in my by the sea series 52 project. You can view the rest of the images here xx} 

Have you escaped lately? What helps to reset your pace? X

Just 10 minutes

"Why don't we take time for ourselves?"

"Because there's always something to do when you're a mum."

"But sometimes I just think it would be nice to be... alone. And do something for me. You know?"

"Yes, but the guilt... What would people think if I put myself first? Did something solely for me? It just sounds so.... indulgent."

"I know, I know... but what if it didn't cost money, and what if it wasn't that much time either... maybe just 10 minutes alone. And what if that 10 minutes meant I would move about the rest of my day feeling recharged, a little more nourished and calmer. Mindful even? That would make it worth it, wouldn't it?"

"I suppose if it was just 10 minutes..."

"Maybe 10 minutes is all I need..."

"Maybe 10 minutes is everything I need."

xx

Do you give yourself a few minutes for you each day?

{I choose to give myself 10 minutes most days. Normally to just be, to breathe, meditate, write. Sometimes I read or take photos. Sometimes I lie down, sometimes I walk. Sometimes I'm not alone. And some days I only find five minutes, but even fewer minutes then I'd like make a world of difference. Image during my 10 minutes this morning by a ferocious sea. So windy my eyes watered, and to watch the waves it became necessary to take refuge behind the boat sheds. Elisa x}

Solitude here. Again.

I keep coming back here. Three weeks in a row. Alone for 10 minutes, sometimes a little more before the pull of work sees me checking the time and moving on. I always leave feeling recharged.

This stretch of beach is small, and almost always deserted. And I think that's why I'm drawn here - to the solitude; all the while listening to my heart, and the sounds of the wind and sea. 

xx

Do you crave solitude too? 

~ This time alone by the sea {and capturing it in photos} began as a way of putting my guiding word for this year (honour) into practice. It's become a ritual and incredibly nourishing for me. The photos above (images 23, 24 and 25/52) are all taken at the same time of day over three weeks. Elisa x

Gratitude

As winter dances it's way into our days, time by the sea almost certainly equates to windy, cold and sprayed by water from crashing waves... 

This week I arrived early enough in the morning to surprise myself, and stayed long enough to watch the sky's colours change majestically. All the while the sea remained its dark and moody self. 

I was reminded of the many changes happening here right now, some inevitable, others chosen... and I kept thinking just how easily I could get swept up and rocked into a rhythm of looking ahead at what most likely will be, at changes expected... how easily I could be filled with anticipation, so much so that the here and now isn't fully felt at all. I can feel the pull in that direction right now... but that's very much not where I want to be. 

And so I witness the changes, and give thanks for what is... for the love I have to give, and the love I readily receive; for full nurturing breaths; for minutes alone by the sea; for little feet that run, dance, tip-toe, stomp and follow me along the floorboards; for the sound of laughter that graces our house every single day. 

I choose to not be swept up with anticipation, instead to honour the now and these very moments, all the while trusting in the next.

xx

{So very many reasons I love the practice of gratitude - it brings me back to my core - to the essence of me; it keeps me mindful; it reminds me to stop and just be; it reminds how my happiness almost always comes from the simplest things; and it always shows me beauty and wonder in the everyday. Elisa xx} 

{Images 22/52 in my by the sea series.} 

What are you most grateful for today?

Surrender

We escaped a little further down the coast. I did a lot of thinking on our drive there. And promptly abandoned thinking when we arrived. It's amazing how much more you can see and feel once you surrender. 

xx

{This is image 21/52 in my by the sea series - miss two doing some thinking of her own. And sending out the biggest thank you for the beautiful comments on my last post. Elisa x}

15 minutes

Just minutes I was gone but it felt like an hour before I looked up, remembered where I was, that I was being waited for and that I should check the time.

The sea was rough and energetic, green, blue and white in places and scattered with rocking boats. The cooler than usual wind kept catching me by surprise.

I watched the scene from behind my camera just as much as without it. And I caught myself breathing deeper, walking slower and noticing wonder every step along the way. 

xx
Ever noticed how just minutes of doing something you love, being somewhere you love and being fully present feels so very much longer? And leaves you feeling renewed and oh-so-alive?

~ 15 minutes alone by the sea. Twice. Images 18 & 19 in my by the sea series xx

>> Interested in receiving my free mindfulness prints and "breathe" meditation eBook? I can't wait to soon send them your way. You can sign up for them here. <<   　

Nurture and need

There's washing to be done. Clothes to fold and sort. Beds to be made. Emails to be sent. Words to be written. Groceries to be bought. And yet here we began our day. Because today the sky looked magical, and I was just so sure the sea would be much the same. And yes it was. The sea and sky met with the calmest of blues. And were greeted by full deep freeing breaths by me, and excited shouts of "I see the water" from miss two. Because sometimes nurture just has to come before what needs to be done. And sometimes it turns out that nurture is your most important need. 

xx

~ photo 20/52 in my by the sea series x {photos 18 & 19 yet to be posted!}

Déjà vu

It's been quiet here. Which usually means I've been over-thinking, journalling and taking a little extra time to just be... 

Twice I sat by the water alone these past two weeks. And the first time I felt the same freedom, anticipation and sense of possibility that I'd felt once before but far far from here. 

Much of the scene was the same - crashing waves and a deserted beach. Just me, my heart and my thoughts. And this time my camera. And despite the rolling in of the waves and the hum of the wind, I could feel the silence and hear my heart whispering to me.

...Change is here, now if you want it. Dream! Take a step forward, and then step back again if you need to. But do move! And love those tiny moments that propel you forward, don't just save all that loving for the final destination...

I kept thinking of the joy in beginning something new that can subdued by fear of what beginning could mean, could entail, could create... I kept thinking how ruling that fear can be. And I kept thinking that was just a thought, and a thought can be changed...

By the sea here I was so very aware that I was alone yet not lonely. It was only as I walked away from the water that I noticed that small pile of sand nestled on the wooden post - yet to be blown away, yet to journey back to the sea. And it suddenly dawned on me that someone else had been here moments before me. And I hoped they saw what I saw, and felt even a little of what I felt. That now is the time. And I really am free to be me.

xx

~ Adding to my reflections by the sea: images 16/52 and 17/52.

Inhale, exhale ~ 15/52

It's been pre-winter colds in our house this past week. And whenever that happens I'm so very conscious of how much I can't breathe. Breathing is such a big part of the meditation I do, and when my breath is short and struggling I feel it more than ever. By the sea this week was just a few minutes stopping here on our drive home. But it was enough time to inhale and exhale, and give thanks for being able to breathe big full beautiful breaths once again.

xx

What are you most grateful for today?  

>> Interested in receiving my free mindfulness prints and "breathe" meditation eBook? I can't wait to soon send them your way. You can sign up for them here. <<   

You ~ 14/52

It's been just the two of us for 15 hours a week for 10 weeks now.

My eyes on you, my heart taking all of you in. Your eyes brimming with excitement, your hand in mine.

And I've noticed...

You hold my hand tighter than usual when it's just the two of us.

When you show me that one-dimple smile, your eyes sparkle. I love it so very much.

You're even cheekier than your big sister. I never would have guessed my gentle baby would be. 

You have so many more words when it's just you and me. And you're not afraid to assert your intentions either. "I walk, no pram." Before the car is even parked...

You like your own company. Keen to explore for yourself. And create some distance between you and me.

You notice everything. So much so I find myself scrambling to make sure I'm noticing enough.

"Cup a tea?" you say as soon as we return home, picking up the teapot in your play kitchen.

And this past month, it's mummy you call me. I'm mama no more.

You're growing into a little girl, but still my baby. As you put it so sweetly to the mother and baby we met in the street, "Hi little baby! I big baby."

And I’m trying so hard to remember every part of you as you are at two and a half, trying so hard to remember these moments now forever. 

But mostly I find myself just focusing on the love, all that love. As you grow, I grow, and that love just keeps on surprising me and expanding even further too.

xx

{Reflections after I took this photo last week ~ a beautifully sand-messy morning with just the two of us by the sea x} 

Just breathe ~ 13/52

Some days I just know I should scrap the first line off my to-do list and replace it with just breathe. Today was one of those. And just breathe I did. Here. And to the sound of softly crashing waves.

xx

Disconnected ~ 12/52

On a Friday I work just a minute's walk from the beach. Last Friday in particular I knew my body and heart were calling for me to set a little time aside, to be by the water and just be, to write for me and focus on my highest priorities. But I decided on the responsible option of working for three hours and spending twenty minutes for me by the sea afterwards. 

The universe had other ideas. As I sat down to work, my laptop took forever to boot up. Then my mobile phone reception went dead - in a place where I always have full reception. Finally my laptop was up and running, but I couldn't connect to the wireless internet. A few more attempts, and 30 minutes later I was online and ready to write. Then I popped my USB into the laptop and the laptop found nothing. I tried again, and again. Nothing. I persisted with the work, doing as much as I could without access to the files I needed, and then finally I gave up.

And trusted that working perhaps wasn't what I was meant to be doing at that very moment. I packed up and walked to the beach. I lay down, closed my eyes and listened to the sounds of the birds and water. But after I while I could only hear the quiet rhythm of my breath. 

Later I checked my phone - full reception. Sometimes I think the universe has a way of forcing us in the direction we deep down know we're meant to be. I see now how much I needed that disconnection from technology on that day, to reconnect fully with the essence of me.

xx

Any messages from the universe headed your way lately?

{This image is part of my photo project "by the sea" series for this year ~ a place I come to stop and just be, and to honour me. More by the sea posts here.}  

Choosing what to see ~ 11/52

Stealing glimpses of the water through tree branches reminds me so much that every day I get to choose what I see and how I see it, and that there's so much I don't see and don't know.

And I think that's okay, as long as I acknowledge there's always something missing from the picture {more to be seen}. 

xx

Alone ~ 10/52

We escaped routine for the weekend and headed here. Forty-eight hours or more of just us. And not a thought about work. It was refreshing, filled with brilliant sunshine, and time to just be. Before we left I decided on waking up a little earlier each morning to go for a walk alone. That sounded like perfection and bliss to me... but both mornings my little ones were up early and eager to join. But later in the day, thirty minutes of solo time came my way. Along the beach I walked, alone with my thoughts to take in big fresh breaths and watch the water's rhythm play out behind these wild irises. A good reminder to prioritise {and trust there will be} time to honour and restore me.  

xx

{More photos from our weekend here}

Do you seek time alone to just be too?

Ten on Ten {finding beauty in the ordinary}

Ten on ten :: one photo an hour for ten consecutive hours on the tenth day of the month. A way of finding and capturing life and beauty in the ordinary things in our everyday.

 

 

 

 

 

1. Up to watch the sun rise three mornings in a row so far... thanks to an early-to-rise little miss four.
2. "Let's follow the flags, Mama! It's like an adventure..."
3. And all the way to the beach we walked. Miss four amazed by the way the sun could sparkle on top of the water. 
4. Captivated by the colour.
5. Succulents are a favourite.
6. Sparkly shoes {and then scraped knees} for our little miss two.
7. Watching the colour of the sky and the colour of the sea, matching in places.
8. Tiny raindrops. But then no more.
9. Miss four's been making a whole lot of wishes this month.
10. A dramatic night sky to cap off a restful weekend.

Photos taken on the tenth, posted here a day late... choosing to trust in perfect timing, and joining the ten on ten photo project with Rebekah here.

xx

Lessons, and letting go ~ 9/52

We picked daisies and I thought about joy. I watched miss two closely. Just the act of being able to pull a daisy out of the ground saw her face light up in the biggest smile.

The flowers came with us to pick-up miss four from pre-school, and it was only then I decided that it was a fitting week to let them go by the sea.

Letting go had been my lesson this past week. I think I relearned it three times. And I think it's one I'll relearn again at a later stage too. Each time a different situation, each time a different emotion - from overwhelm to grief to relief at the letting go.

Miss four lined up the flowers for me. I took the photos, unsure whether I should focus on what was in front of me {the daisies but also this very moment, and my emotions} or focus ahead on what will pass and what could be {out to the sea, how much better I hoped I'd feel by the week's end, happier times}.

As we got ready to throw the daisies out to sea, a gust of wind took all but one. And it took me by surprise but at the same time seemed a little fitting that the letting go happened all on it's own, before we were ready.

I let the last daisy fall gently to the water and sat to watch it float away. And miss four took control of the camera, pointing out to me that there was so much more than my drifting flower to see.

xx

>> Interested in receiving my free mindfulness prints and "breathe" meditation eBook? I can't wait to soon send them your way. You can sign up for them here. <<   　  

Then and now ~ 8/52

A little late in getting this one up. Last week went from crazy to crazier... I headed to a beach I would drive to often when I first got my license at 18. There used to be a jetty here, but it's long gone now. For some reason I thought I'd see the magic here I saw then. But that wasn't the case. An overcast and windy day, and a week of busy and doing my very best to let go of what I can't control may have dampened the view a little... but sitting looking out at the sea, even if for just a few moments, reminded me to breathe. And that was probably what I needed to remember most last week.

xx

Are you doing a 52 project or daily project of some type this year? If so, I'd love to know. I'm rather grateful I chose this photo project to keep me centred on my guiding word this year xx