Light // One word 2018

Light. I've been capturing it in photographs, tuning into my heart + light within, looking for the light in all situations of late and seeking a lighter load for this year ... Light resonates with how I want to feel, and what I want to share. 

It kind of feels like I breathed my way here throughout 2017.

Light is also a reminder for me that out of heaviness, dark, mess and shade, light can be found. And felt. But also it's a promise to acknowledge the shadows, to work with them + love myself through them.

I processed loads of emotion in 2017 and shifted so many limiting beliefs. It felt messy and complicated like a burden at times and a lot like grief + heartache.

With breathe as my guiding word last year, I continually came back to my breath as the answer to most situations - when life felt rushed, in moments I wanted to remember, in stillness and in quiet.

I came back to my breath in the loud of life with three kids.
I took deeper yet lighter breaths while watching the sunset most nights.
I allowed myself to breathe with intention the minute I woke, during meditation, and before I journalled.
For solo minutes, I stopped to just to breathe. 

And this practice created a lightness, space and room for the old to release and the new to grow. I feel so much lighter for it. And full of heart, hope + peace. I want to share a little more of this, my light and my heart this year. It feels like with light as my guide, that I've begun with a breath of fresh air.

Xx

Finally sharing my one guiding word for 2018! Three months in, but better late than never! Have you chosen a guiding word for this year? Have you blogged about it? I'd love to know/read about it. Elisa xx 

I keep coming back to here

I keep coming back to here. Every day if I can. At least five times a week of late. 

The sea reminds me to breathe full breaths. It brings me back to my breath. To one single breath. 

It reminds me that each moment is precious. And to feel all of me in this very moment. Not to think of yesterday's moments or tomorrow's. This moment. And then the next.

When I stand here with the sea, I feel all the more alive. Because here I am mindfulness. Sometimes only for a handful of minutes. Sometimes I'm afforded a whole lot more. But presence, regardless of the time limit, is what makes the difference.

I'm sharing today a round up of images of the sea I've taken in recent weeks. 

Notice how each is so different? Notice how the colours of the sea change each day? As does it's rhythm. 

I've tried to capture the beauty of the sea in my photos, yet none are similar and different aspects have stood out to me each day. 

Each time I pause to observe the sea, I find myself acknowledging how it presents on this day, connecting with its rhythm and giving thanks for it. I never judge the sea. I find beauty in the sea despite its actions, despite its rhythm, despite its appearance. There's a lesson in there. And it's so very applicable to me. 

As I breathed in the sea air this morning, I gave thanks for the me that simply showed up today. I gave thanks with gentleness, kindness and a loving heart. Without judgement. And realised this space feels new to me. 

So here I stand, committing to loving me better. Unconditionally. Stepping into my own power. With big nourishing sea breaths as encouragement. And as a reminder that this moment, this breath, right now is always the perfect time to begin. Again. 

xx

Do you love the sea too? Is my lesson a lesson for you? 

What actions do you take to nurture your heart and soul? To love your whole self better?
I'd love to know. Elisa x

>>>>> See here for what's included in my free mindfulness bundle, which is quite a bit and is looking a bit more mini-ebook worthy than bundle right about now..! I can't wait to share it with you! It includes a bundle of mindful ways + words + activities to encourage you to easily connect with your heart + the power of your amazing life breath. And next month it will launch! I'm just putting the pretty touches on it now :) Elisa x

Interrupt busy with slow

This year started off with the most wondrous of intentions. Intentions to move slowly, be grace, live purposefully, breathe with intention. And I'm not saying I haven't done all those things. To a wonderful extent I have. 

But then along came the chaos. The busy. I'm dubbing it "the scheduled life". When there's so much to be done, and so many commitments that all the moments seem played out in routine. It kills spontaneity. And it turns a slow and mindful rhythm into a routine. And to that mishaps and mess + throw in a tonne of winter colds and coughs. 

I felt it approaching a month or so back. I felt despair. And a whole lot alone and helpless in getting all the things done while carving out the slow, heart-centred rhythm that I need. {I've come to understand that slow and heart-centred is quite simply how I thrive.} 

To some extent, busy cannot be stopped. Maybe, like me, you have three young children. Or maybe, like old me, you have a busy corporate job that works to strict deadlines. It's hard to stop the busy when you simply have so much necessary stuff to be done. 

I've researched this very topic on a personal level for the past 10 years. Rushing and the stress that tagged along with it was making me sick. I needed the antidote to busy and rushing. And I have a conclusion: We need to be okay with some busy. Life simply demands it. But we don't need to become "busy". Busy doesn't need to be our state of being: our sense of self from the minute we open our eyes from sleep to the minute they close again at night. 

So, what to do?

Interrupt busy with slow. That there is my solution. And it's working. For me.

It means slowing down, and taking a dose of mindfulness to heart. But it doesn't mean becoming a constant state of slow and mindful. We can still be mindful and not practise mindfulness every single moment of our waking day. 

I say, begin with a handful of minutes. Or add an extra handful of minutes to your already mindful routine. I'm honestly talking about just a few minutes. And this isn't about setting aside time to be mindful. It's about choosing slow + mindful when your amidst busy. It's about noticing that busy pace, and choosing to interrupt it. 

I fold these mindful rituals into the everyday effortlessly. Because as well as slow and mindful, simplicity {for me} is key. 

RESET YOUR RHYTHM + When I'm running around in the mess that can be mornings with kids, I choose to step away from the chaos, step outside with my cup of tea. I savour those sips, I look to the sky, I breathe. I move slowly. Just for a minute, before joining the mess again. Albeit calmer and more mindful. 

LOOK TO NATURE + When I've had a busy morning or afternoon, I pull the car over by the sea* on my drive home. I step outside {or we step outside, as I almost always have children in tow} to watch the water, taking note of the rhythm the sea is moving to today, breathing deeply and fully, taking in that sea air.  

STEP OUTSIDE + I often choose to eat my lunch outdoors, especially if the sun is shining. I notice the feel of the sun on my face, it's warmth. I pause before eating to just breathe, to give thanks for this moment, my food, the sun's shine. I notice the sky's colour, the patterns of the clouds. I tend to eat slower when I do this. Eat more mindfully. I'm present.

JUST BREATHE + And when I simply can't make make my slow minutes an escape, I just take a minute to tune into my breath. I notice its pace. I listen to the inhalation / the exhalation. I invite myself to breathe deeper and slower than before, and to release that breath fully. I invite myself to move slower. To walk/speak/react at a slower pace. Just for a minute. 

To counteract life's busy, interrupt it. With slow. For me, it works.

xx

Will you give it a go? What activities help you stay centred and mindful in the here and now? I'd love to know. Elisa x

*Of course, not everyone lives close to the sea! But the sky is just as wondrous! Look to the patterns playing out across the sky from home or work, notice how it changes, notice how it's changed an hour later, tune into the rhythms of the sky as you could the sea. Just as expansive, just as mesmerising, ever-changing with the rhythms of life - as are we.     


--------- >> Learn about what's in my free mindfulness activity bundle for embracing slow + mindful, and tuning into the power of your breath here.  

--------- >> I have a new instagram account: @ohhelloheart xx

Taking a chance + starting before you're ready

I've realised {in the past couple months} that I find it easy to overlook myself in the day-to-day. And the problem with that - with not carving out minutes of your every day solely for you - is that soon those days become weeks, months and you look back and realise you've made loads of plans + let ideas swirl in your head... and that's where they've stayed. As floating ideas and hand-written plans. In a notepad.

I pretty much woke up to this realisation. Just woke up and thought, that's enough. 

I realised I don't actually believe in myself as much as I think I do.
I realised that taking a chance on me is damn scary.
I realised that I've been waiting for permission to give more of my heart's writing + soul's stirrings a real go. {Permission from who, I'm not quite sure.}
I realised that now's the time. {Actually, now is always the time.}
I realised that I'm very good at talking myself out of taking a chance.
I realised that even the thought of vulnerability cripples me {used to cripple me}.
I realised that living my truth - writing it, sharing it, speaking it - is where I want to be {always}.
I realised I was giving myself the opposite advice I'd give to my beautiful girls.
I realised if I didn't call myself out on this one. Say "that's enough" and actually mean it, I'd be moving in these circles for many years to come. 

And so, I scribbled words down on paper - words + feelings standing in my way. I came up with "taking a chance on me", "trust", "authenticity" + "vulnerability". And I've accepted they're all really good friends, and I no longer want them to be a roadblock in my way.  

So I've been breathing my way forward. 

This past month has been about pulling back, slowing down and breathing with intention. Focusing on what matters most. And that's meant little time for anything that's not mothering my three + nurturing my heart. 

I'm embracing my ideas little by little, and navigating them into existence slowly but surely. And I'm starting before I feel ready. And those little steps I'm taking, it turns out they feel like bounds once you make a few.

xx

Have you taken a chance on yourself lately? Have you started a new project recently? Any lessons on vulnerability you'd like to share? 

With big nourishing breaths + much much love, Elisa x


~~~~~~~~ >> FREE PRINTS + MINDFULNESS BUNDLE: Thank you to all the lovely people who have signed up early before my mindfulness bundle + breathe prints are ready! Thank you for taking a chance on me! I've added a couple simple meditations and the bundle is almost ready to send. You can check out what's included here. Elisa xx

~~~~~~~~ >> NEW INSTAGRAM: I've created a new instagram @ohhelloheart that's solely for my writing, mindfulness + meditation. Love you to come say hi! Elisa X

Autumn reflections + seasonal reads

Oh Autumn! You've been intense. Refreshing so. 

You've taught me about bravery, vulnerability + authenticity. And that's seen me take a chance + embrace change. Ever so gently. Slowly. Slow enough to feel the letting go that change beckons, yet not be swept up + overwhelmed by it's current.

But mostly, this season has reminded me to carve out more time in nature to breathe and be. And in those breaths, I've been reminded why I create. Why I write. Why my heart needs it. Why writing is the key to my balance.

And so, this winter I will take time to delve within. In stillness and in heart. I will take moments of time afforded between mothering and make them mine. From here, I will write. And with my autumn-found courage, I will share. 

xx

As the season changes to winter here I'll be turning to these reads:
- The Way of The Happy Woman* by Sara Avant Stover {inspiration, yoga + gentleness for the season's rhythm}
- Only Love Today* by Rachel Macy Stafford {seasonal reminders + inspiration as I parent with heart}
- And I'll be most likely playing with this Love Notes card deck* by Kris Carr + Lori Portka all year {bringing awareness to my body, self + situations with love}. 

xx

How has this season been for you? Does your rhythm change as the seasons do? Any recommended reads?
I'd love to know. Elisa xx


*affiliate links. This means if you choose to purchase these recommendations, a tiny percentage of the price comes back to me.

With a single breath and a heart-focused intention

One week into Feb, 38 days into the new year... And it only now feels like my year is beginning.

We've sent a little one off to prep, a confident and eager miss seven into grade two and my little miss Ruby {now 21 months} is at home navigating our world with me by her side.

I haven't set a pace so far this year. And that's been unsettling for me. I've wanted a rhythm. But instead strived for a heart-centred hum to our days. We've done beautifully in carving out memories and moments this summer. And when all sense of balance has been thrown out, we've paused, breathed, banded together and started again.

Our first few weeks of January were slow and long in the best way. I found myself nourishing and nurturing my three together, but carving out time with each of my girls alone too. There's something about giving all your attention to them individually that sets my heart alight, as though I'm seeing them with new eyes, giving all my love to just one for a few moments. It's really quite hard to explain. 

But today it feels like only now my year is truly beginning, now that school is back, and I can schedule in some time for writing, some time for nurture, time to create and time to be alone. And it turns out that's what I've craved most so far this year. Time alone to write, to breathe, to just be. To reconnect with me.

And so, I've been dwelling on little rituals I can fold effortlessly into my day. Three rounds of salute to the sun in the morning. Ducking out the door for a short morning walk as the sun rises while the rest of the house sleeps. Stepping outside to look at the sky {looking up and giving thanks}. Writing down my blessings. Just writing, anything at all, but mostly for my heart. Reading a few pages of a new book before bed. Reminding myself to breathe, and then breathing and doing absolutely nothing else.  

And it seems this is where my rituals begin, with a single breath and a heart-focused intention. So here's to the start of a new year, and gratitude with each breath.

xx

How was your January? Do you carve any mindful or nurturing rituals into your mornings/day? I'd love to know. Elisa xx


~ Sending out three digital prints via my newsletter next month! Finally, they are ready!  Plus, some breath-centered mantras and affirmations for you. If you'd like me to send them your way, you can add your email here.

One word // breathe

Breathe. It's my word for the year. I think it's been calling me for years now. Nine actually. It's sat there humming in the background, drawing me in to learn a little, then letting me adventure elsewhere. 

But now it seems breathe is in my every moment. 

To me, breathe is about creating space. That's space within me. And space in my days for more of what matters most.

Breathe is a reminder to pause in stillness {to breathe and just be}. 

And to be mindful {of my words, thoughts, actions}.

It's about creating space within {and for} myself {so I have more to give}.

It's pausing to give thanks {breathing in grace, breathing out gratitude}.

It's about letting go of fear, and replacing the gaps with love {so much love}. 

A breath is just a moment, but {to me} a breath savoured feels like so much more than that. 

xx

Breathe is a naturally extension of my last year's word, surrender, and it seems that's the way this word caper pans out for me. One leads into the other effortlessly, with stirrings of it mentioned here and there {in writing and conversation} until it's impossible to ignore or call a coincidence. 

So, "breathe" will be my guide. A focus word to set the rhythm for my heart's year; to steer me as I live, learn, grow, thrive. 

xx 

Do you choose a guiding word each year? Do you set intentions? I'd love to know. Elisa x


~ I have a bundle of free mindfulness prints ready to send out at the end of the month, and a meditation mini-ebook coming out mid year. If this interests you, please do sign up for them here xx

A year of {learning} surrender

Two whole months and a handful of days into this year and I couldn't keep up. That's after thriving my way through last year. The change in emotion and pace left me unsettled for a long while.  

Change entered here in an abundance, add to that a decent dose of overwhelm, the perfectionist in me coming out to play, cue feelings of failure and then replay that overwhelm... and that pretty much summed up the first six months. Each month felt big, then the next month simply followed suit.

Among all this I wondered just how and when surrender {my guiding word this year} would surface and what it would teach me, because it was feeling far off. 

Each month I seemed to relearn surrender, reset my rhythm, and reprioritise. I felt oh-so-tested. Continually tested. 


And when I look back, I can see I let this feeling keep me away from this space. I'd come back and share, then tell myself that once I got on top of things I'd come back again. But I never really got on top of it. 

I saw surrender as calm, a slower pace and quite frankly me at the top of my game, just like the previous year. I didn't see surrender as "giving up". But, it was only once I threw the towel in on my "big plans" and preconceived ideas on how surrender would pan out this year, that surrender arrived. 

I found new ways of making space and time for breathing; I spent a lot of this year researching, studying and reading all I could on mindfulness; and I rekindled my meditation practices {finding myself meditating in five minute bursts, and amazed at what a few minutes of heart-centred awareness can create}.  

And so this year I've accepted that I'm not as good at surrender as I first thought... I've accepted that it's more than okay to schedule slow {and all that will create slow within my day}... I found myself adding meditate, write and walk to the top of my to-do list. Before all the shoulds and musts. And it turns out prioritising surrender moments is not just about mindfulness and creating a gentle kinder rhythm, but about nurturing my soul. xx

How are you? Did you choose a guiding word this year? What did it teach you, and will you choose one for next year too? 

~ I have a bundle of free mindfulness prints ready to send out, and a meditation mini-ebook coming out mid year. You can sign up for them here xx

Oh, here I am. No longer on hold.

Ever sit back and think how'd I get here? When doing what simply needs to be done becomes your everyday, and then months later you find yourself doing that something you love and think "Here I am! This is me. I'm doing what I love, where time feels limitless, and my heart just knows how to soar!" 

Has this happened to you? The putting yourself on hold? And then you notice that limitless feeling when you're doing what you love? When you're doing whatever it is that puts you in your flow, where time is lost, where seconds join into one big heart moment and you realise that being you is enough. Always was. And then you wonder why you spent so long striving to do more of the everyday, but less of what you love...

I suppose what I'm trying to say is that at some point in the past year I put that part of me {my self nourishment, my creativity, my heart work} on the shelf. I could see it sitting there, but thought, "No, not today, not tomorrow, not now. I'm too busy with everything. No, you can sit right there and look pretty. I know you're there, but no, not right now. You can wait."

And the more that part of me that is my creativity, my soul, my heart {the part of me that I give best to the world} called out, the more I said, "Oh thanks for the reminder, but you'll just have to be a memory right now. A lovely memory, yes. But a memory because I'm too busy keeping a clean house, a happy home and nurturing my three little ones - best things to ever happen to me! And no you just don't make the cut right now."

And then people were asking me about my writing - Was I still writing? Why wasn't I still writing? And the whole while I was thinking but not saying, "Can't they see how busy I am?" 

And then somehow, by some trick of nature I ended up opening this part of me again by mistake. I said yes to a friend, "Oh, of course I can help out, share my words, share my wisdom..." when I meant to say, "No, I'm far too busy, and I've put that part of me on the shelf for a while..."

And so I reluctantly opened me up, and long behold the creativity hadn't dried up! Not one bit. It came pouring out, flooding actually. 

And here I am taking every moment I can to type or scribble away {letting my heart's words be free} ignoring my thoughts that suggest I should be doing something "useful", because it turns out this is the part of me that is meant to be free all.the.time. 

Last month {after weeks of consciously choosing to let myself write again} I woke up {that should read was woken up every early by three very-awake little girls demanding breakfast} and I noticed I felt renewed, so very alive. I knew instantly what had changed. I'd started writing again, writing for me, writing from my heart. As I walked into the kitchen, my miss six took one look at me, and her big brown eyes grew bigger, "You look different. Good different. I like it." And that's reason enough for me to continue giving space to this part of me. I like it too.

xx

Do you feel limitless when you create? What makes you feel alive? And have you done this before - put a part of you on hold? I do think at times other events take priority and we need to, but perhaps just not for too long... or perhaps this long was just enough? Elisa x

One word // Surrender

Towards the end of last year it felt like I was given no choice but to surrender. And still I resisted it.

I had big plans for 2015. Bigger than big plans - a return to study, new work commitments and a few personal projects up my sleeve too, and daily blog writing (ha!) 

The universe, of course, had other ideas but did promptly offer me my asked-for serving of big - in the form of our darling Ruby. 2015 was BIG in the best way. 

It pushed me to rediscover myself, but mostly reminded me who I am and who I am striving to be.

I got better at letting go of the big {end} picture, instead focusing on doing what I could with what I had. 

I came to believe that would be enough. That my best is as much as I can do. 

I discovered so much more about trust. And that my intuition is always spot on. 

I learnt to ask. And how to let my heart answer.

I improved at listening. And finally accepted that it's hard for me not to talk.

I realised that people like to help. And I realised that I'm pretty good at helping and supporting myself.

I discovered that in doing less, I am able to give more. And in surrendering to this, I have felt more alive than I ever have.

Almost two weeks ago I caught myself holding my breath. As I exhaled, the word surrender rolled off my tongue. 

I knew immediately it was my one word for this year. My reminder to go slowly, to be present, to be kinder to myself. 

xx

Have you chosen one word to guide your year? Do you set intentions? I'd love to know. Elisa x

~ Sharing my one word with Bron at Maxabella Loves here.

~ I'm excited to be finally putting my meditation training to good use this year. I'll be creating and soon sending out {monthly is the plan!} some free mindful word/photography prints, plus affirmations and journalling/meditation practices and prompts to go with them. If that sounds like your thing, feel free to add your email address via the form here. 

Almost

It's a funny feeling being here. So hard to describe. Yet when you mention it to someone who's been here too they just know the feeling, and without a description. It's being in a space of waiting yet a space of readiness. A space in-between. An almost.

It's a wanting to force time to move faster.
It's knowing surrender is the only answer.
It's understanding this is so much bigger than me.
It's wondering. Wondering about time, how events will unravel, about you, about the four of us becoming five. 
And it's craving. Craving that sweet explosion of love I will feel when you first enter my arms. 

38 weeks. So close. So very close. For now I breathe and send love to you, little one. And I embrace this moment; this feeling, us here and now. Knowing that despite living this almost feeling three times now, this will be my last.

xx

Big breaths, no tears

Big breaths have been taken this past week.

Because I'm trying my very best to get in some full nurturing breaths and create some extra comfort for me and room in this fast growing belly for baby.

Because focusing on my breath reminds me to slow.

Because I can't seem to schedule a yoga class this pregnancy, despite plenty of trying. And breathing is my favourite part of yoga.

Because we let go of our little girl that little bit extra this week and watched her dance on into her prep classroom, eager as ever for school to begin. There were no tears from her, and no tears from me but the letting go certainly stung a little.

Big breaths too because seeing her off to school saw me consumed by anxiety at the very last minute. Because what if I hadn't given her enough, shown her enough, taught her enough, been there enough... so many what ifs filled my head one sleepless night. And then early in the morning sleep finally arrived, as I comforted myself in the thought that I probably wasn't alone in feeling this way and remembered I've loved her as much as my whole heart can love, and isn't love always enough?

More big breaths to come this next week as miss three sets off for kindergarten. And with both my babes busy learning and having fun for five hours one day a week I plan on carving out a little time each morning before I get stuck into work that involves breathing, and pretty much nothing else. A few minutes where it's just me, the sound of the waves, time to just be and time to connect with baby. Creating space to slow, to tune in, to love. Creating space and joy.

xx

Wishing you nurturing breaths this week, and the next. Has this week been filled with starting something new for you too? x

~ Love that my hubby captured this image of me and my big girl on her first school morning. We had plenty of smiling photos. And then when I thought he had stopped snapping, she turned to me with a big hug: "Today is soooo exciting Mummy." 

Catching my breath + the happiest news

I've spent the past two months catching my breath (courtesy of a whirlwind of work, nausea, preparations for end of kinder / start of school for miss five, and exhaustion). 

And searching for more breath. (When breathwork is at the core of your meditation practise, a family of four taking turns at gastro then two weeks of a lingering cough/cold certainly gets in the way). 

And then finally making time to just breathe. 

And this time around just breathing meant abandoning a few of things I wanted to be doing, mainly being here writing about new-found joy, excitement, anticipation and all the growth these past five months have entailed.

Instead I found myself sitting a lot, witnessing, reflecting. And watching my girls (now five and three) ever so closely. All of sudden they seem so big, so grown up. I want to bottle their energy as it is now, to savour and remember these moments. I've felt scared I'll forget the little things they say, their laughter as it is now, us as we are now. Each day they are growing, changing, learning, and it felt like I couldn't keep up. 

A fortnight ago miss three and I sat in the grass. She picked daisies. I sat down to breathe, to stretch and soak up the sunshine, my camera by my side; and all the while admiring her abundance of energy - energy I was lacking. 

After beheading more daisies then her little hands could hold, she decided to slow down, join my pace and copy my pose - that's her in the image above.

And it was then I felt myself taking a deeper breath and only then noticing the breath cycle I'd be living in, despite stopping to breathe being a focus in my days.

It was then I realised I don't need to keep up with my girls, I just need to show up. To be there in the moment with them as much as I can; to love them; to be a witness to (and encourage) their curiousity, creativity, kindness, wonder and love; to share my heart with them and to sit back and soak up our days and our rhythms (even the messy ones) with a big breath. And to know and accept that there will be times I'll wish I'd done things differently. 

And as I step into week 21 of growing our newest baby girl - hopefully that explains my nausea, exhaustion and absence from the blog :) - I'm breathing easier than before; and making wishes for a new year with joy and love as our guides.

xx

How are you? Are you breathing freely? Any happy news to share? xx    

Nurture and need

There's washing to be done. Clothes to fold and sort. Beds to be made. Emails to be sent. Words to be written. Groceries to be bought. And yet here we began our day. Because today the sky looked magical, and I was just so sure the sea would be much the same. And yes it was. The sea and sky met with the calmest of blues. And were greeted by full deep freeing breaths by me, and excited shouts of "I see the water" from miss two. Because sometimes nurture just has to come before what needs to be done. And sometimes it turns out that nurture is your most important need. 

xx

~ photo 20/52 in my by the sea series x {photos 18 & 19 yet to be posted!}

Inhale, exhale ~ 15/52

It's been pre-winter colds in our house this past week. And whenever that happens I'm so very conscious of how much I can't breathe. Breathing is such a big part of the meditation I do, and when my breath is short and struggling I feel it more than ever. By the sea this week was just a few minutes stopping here on our drive home. But it was enough time to inhale and exhale, and give thanks for being able to breathe big full beautiful breaths once again.

xx

What are you most grateful for today?  

>> Interested in receiving my free mindfulness prints and "breathe" meditation eBook? I can't wait to soon send them your way. You can sign up for them here. <<   

Just breathe ~ 13/52

Some days I just know I should scrap the first line off my to-do list and replace it with just breathe. Today was one of those. And just breathe I did. Here. And to the sound of softly crashing waves.

xx

Hello fear

And here we go again... right when I thought I had faced so much fear head-on already this year, and surfaced relatively unscathed, stronger for sure, with new learnings, new insight, a lighter mind and brighter outlook... there it was again. 

Fear. Consuming me with what could be. Not what was. Not what is. But what could be. Which most certainly would never be. But...

I've decided in a moment of fear it feels there's no easy way to short-circuit that fear cycle, but there always is.... and it certainly becomes easier as preconceived ideas are broken down and coping strategies learnt in the process.

This time I tackled fear with these thoughts: Just breathe. Take one step at a time. Be in the now.

And the thing is, there's no fear in my right now. Not one bit. And fearing what could be... well, when I put it like that, it does seems kind of futile.

So here's to making plans but not forcing time, to living moments as they present, to remembering to breathe when unsettling emotions strike, and to knowing that dealing with them will only make you stronger.

xx

How do you deal with fear? Has fear {or facing fears} been on your mind?

Lessons, and letting go ~ 9/52

We picked daisies and I thought about joy. I watched miss two closely. Just the act of being able to pull a daisy out of the ground saw her face light up in the biggest smile.

The flowers came with us to pick-up miss four from pre-school, and it was only then I decided that it was a fitting week to let them go by the sea.

Letting go had been my lesson this past week. I think I relearned it three times. And I think it's one I'll relearn again at a later stage too. Each time a different situation, each time a different emotion - from overwhelm to grief to relief at the letting go.

Miss four lined up the flowers for me. I took the photos, unsure whether I should focus on what was in front of me {the daisies but also this very moment, and my emotions} or focus ahead on what will pass and what could be {out to the sea, how much better I hoped I'd feel by the week's end, happier times}.

As we got ready to throw the daisies out to sea, a gust of wind took all but one. And it took me by surprise but at the same time seemed a little fitting that the letting go happened all on it's own, before we were ready.

I let the last daisy fall gently to the water and sat to watch it float away. And miss four took control of the camera, pointing out to me that there was so much more than my drifting flower to see.

xx

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Then and now ~ 8/52

A little late in getting this one up. Last week went from crazy to crazier... I headed to a beach I would drive to often when I first got my license at 18. There used to be a jetty here, but it's long gone now. For some reason I thought I'd see the magic here I saw then. But that wasn't the case. An overcast and windy day, and a week of busy and doing my very best to let go of what I can't control may have dampened the view a little... but sitting looking out at the sea, even if for just a few moments, reminded me to breathe. And that was probably what I needed to remember most last week.

xx

Are you doing a 52 project or daily project of some type this year? If so, I'd love to know. I'm rather grateful I chose this photo project to keep me centred on my guiding word this year xx