Because now is good enough a time

I read this quote the other day...

 

"It's a terrible thing, I think, in life to wait until you're ready. I have this feeling that actually no one is ever ready to do anything. There is almost no such thing as ready. There is only now. And you may as well do it now. Generally speaking, now is as good a time as any." ~ Hugh Laurie

And it resonated with me or perhaps dawned on me. Whatever it did I actually stopped what I was doing. Walked away. I stopped to just be. To journal. And let clarity arrive.

 

Here's what I realised.

1. I've put two big dreams (they're actually connected - can't have one without the other) on hold for the past year. Because, in my defence, other opportunities crept up. But also because... maybe I'm not ready, or maybe it's just not the right time, or what if I do all that work and then it's just not good enough, what if nobody likes what I've created ... you get the picture.

 

2. Worse than being on hold I haven't even started. Haven't even taken the first step. I've just let my dream sit up in my head in dreamland and swirl around with no destination, no timeline, no real agenda. No starting point.

 

3. I write more than 5000 words each month for publications. Other people's publications. Yes that's my job as a freelance writer, yes that's what I love doing, and yes that's my career... But I don't give my own writing the same time of day and space or credit. Yes those other words are paid work, yes I enjoy writing them, but the other writing - well if I'm honest that's where my heart lies... and that just has to deserve a little more attention.  Somewhere in my week. Somehow...

 

And so instead of wondering, instead of trying to create a plan, action list or timeline.. I just started. Just like that. No holding back. I just opened a new journal and I wrote. And then wrote some more... 

 

The words came easily, the ideas kept bouncing and I felt free. Finally, I was doing it. No matter about an ending point, no matter about being good enough. Just letting my heart take the lead.

 

Because there's no perfect time and now is good enough a time.

 

It feels wonderful to simply begin.

 

xx

Anything you've been putting on hold? Any new dreams or plans you've recently begun? x

Missing. Lately.

 

I've been missing in action at With Grace & Eve lately.... Right when I thought I'd found a relaxed mindful rhythm of heart centred moments...when I'd found my balance... mother guilt and fear crept up on me.                       

 

I almost immediately intentionally pulled back to centre in on me - my emotional wellbeing - and to reassess, to slow further, to find my clarity and to release the guilt and fear that weren't serving me one bit well.

 

That pulling back was really a letting go. And a reminder to do what needed to be done, and do nothing extra. A releasing of old patterns, to create time and space for new.

Clarity came and showed me what was missing. Slowly.

 

I craved the written word, and particularly that which I'd read before. So I read the same words, but gained new insight.

 

 I wrote just for me. I created new affirmations. And silently and repetitively I affirmed: "My best is good enough."

 

And I spent the solo minutes my day afforded me in stillness, drawn to meditation and realigning myself with the power of my breath. 

 

And after two birthday celebrations (now we have a little miss two and little miss four!) this past two months I have felt the need to hold my babies close a little more each day.     
 

As I slowed, it felt as though time was affording me more heart moments. But less I wanted to share.     
 

I gave myself a mindful project, to ground and centre with two little girls in tow. I stepped outside at about the same time each day for seven days to take photos at the same place. Minutes of just being with my girls, in awareness, mindful of moments and the power of presence all at once.

And I've missed this space but the lesson has been in the missing. It's made me notice what's missing from my days, and it's shown me once again the freedom and presence that comes from honouring where I'm at. And the wonder that comes from making space for new and change.

   

xx

 

Has anything been missing from your days of late? And does that affirmation {"My best is good enough"} resonate with you? When I shared it on facebook, it was reassuring to know it was something others felt they needed too. Elisa x

 

A little less, a little more

I've been thinking about what I could go a little less of and a little more of since seeing this Blackmores ad*.

Actually I'd been thinking loads recently about what was missing from my days, but I like the little more, little less concept so much better. Especially the little part. No big scary changes, just gentle shifts in the direction I want to sail.

A little less procastination, a little more sleep 

A little less checking the clock, a little more cardio 

A little less staring at the computer screen, a little more staring at the water

A little less facebook, a little more book reading

A little less talking, a little more listening 

A little less planning, a little more taking chances

A little less fear, a little more courage

Some of these are really big for me. But with little in front of them it feels like I can tackle them. Slowly, bit by bit. More or less.

xx

What would you go a little less of? Or a little more of?

{Gratitude this week for the little changes I am committing to making, for the fears I have decided on facing, and for health - because while it hasn't been in our house much for the past fortnight it almost always is. Elisa xx}

*I have no affiliation with Blackmores. I was just inspired by the concept/ad! 

In the planning



We've been making plans.

Some little {and mostly spontaneous too}: a walk in the forest, a drive down the coast, going somewhere new...

But some are bigger. A holiday for our little family of four. Day trips and weekends away.
We're finding even more places to explore. And instead of our usual thinking {and wondering} about when the time might be right to go there, we're just doing it.

That means mixing up routines a little, and as that happens I'm witnessing the rhythm of our days move from bursts of fast to pockets of slow {and that's okay}.

Time feels full of so much wonder and joy when we make it ours. And for the first time in a long while, it feels like we're getting more time {together} too.

xx

{Grateful for the new discoveries we're sharing and time spent together. We're working our way through our little list quite nicely. I checked in with it yesterday and smiled at all the memories we've made. And of course, after a week of slow and nothing new, this week has been big with lashings of chaos thrown in. Because life can. And because I needed the reminder that things come and go, but gratitude remains steady if I choose it. Elisa x}

~ Joining late with the 52 Weeks of Grateful at here.


What are you most grateful for today? x

 

These Autumn days

 

 

 

 

 

Farewell Autumn.
I already miss you.  
 

Your crisp mornings         
and your mesmerising colours.    

Watching the trees transform,

leaves dance in the wind and
the way you perform change with grace. 

I'll miss sunset walks
and bright-blue cloudless skies

on the chilliest of days.    

xx

{I've loved this Autumn and its lessons in change, its invitation to step into nature and slow me down. These photos represent the little moments of beauty I've discovered and captured on walks with my girls. I'll miss the gorgeous Autumn days we've spent outdoors - they've felt wondrous in so many ways. Today it felt just like Autumn, but tonight Winter has definitely arrived. Elisa x}

 

What season do you love most? Will you miss Autumn? x

Out of balance

I had a post ready to go about balancing work and motherhood and my thoughts and feelings as I walked out the door to work...

And then this week happened and it's thrown me. I had the balance of mixing work (from home two days a week) plus study and mothering down pat when it was just one cherub to love and care for each day. But with two cherubs and one point five days a week of paid work I seem to be a little lost.

I've got to-do lists longer than I want to share. And this week I've combined adrenalin-racing spurts of rushed with mindful and still pockets of slow. And I feel like I'm doing a little of everything but not a lot of anything. I do feel like I'm doing these little things well, except maybe the housework...

And this balance curve ball has got me thinking. A lot.
About what I really want.
About what makes my heart sing.
About keeping myself in balance.
About living a life I love.
About what needs to be done. And what really doesn't.
About how I spend my time.
About disconnecting. To reconnect.
About what I can achieve now. And what I can trust there will be time to achieve later.

As I drove home tonight and reached our street I looked up at my favourite tree pausing to watch how its branches play out against the sky, and that's when I realised that sometimes balance needs to get mucked up and turned upside down and tossed about. Just so you can refind balance. Reconnect. Make changes. Start again.

xx

{Grateful for the clarity that came out of a lack of balance, and for work opportunities but mostly for the days I get to spend at home with my girls. Elisa x}

~ Linking with the gratitude community at the 52 Weeks of Grateful

Do you reassess balance? And what's making you most grateful this week? x

Embracing change {seeing colour}

This year I made a wish for one thing. One big thing. But I didn't give my wish clarity. I did give it my heart.

The universe has responded with lashings of support and an abundance of wishful wonder. So much so it gave me four things in response to my one wish. Four things piled on top of each other and alongside each other and fighting for moments all at the same time.

And it's left me feeling oh-so-grateful, refreshed, excited and dizzy and cloudy-headed at the same time. So, I find myself seeking clarity and re-introducing myself to slow lately.

It's as though when the season changed to Autumn, a shift occurred within me and around me too.

And so I've retreated to nature {with my camera} these past weeks to walk in the grass, feel the leaves, really notice the colours around me and look up through the tree branches, but mostly to find clarity and embrace change. Miss three has collected leaves in every colour she could find. And it feels as though the changing colours of those Autumn leaves are telling me my story.

xx

{Gratitude for wishes come true, clarity, change embraced and seeing Autumn colour. Joining the gratitude community at Maxabella's 52 Weeks of Grateful. Elisa x}

Have you made a wish lately? What are you most grateful for this week?

What change brings

They say change is as good as a holiday. And I hear myself blurting out this line a lot in conversation too.

This saying helps me more easily accept change {when it arrives out of my control}.

And with this saying in mind, I can more easily bid farewell to the old and welcome the new {believing change will do me good}.

This past year working through {and waiting for} change has brought uncertainty, worry and endless wondering...

But the whole time I've held onto the belief that change would deliver {in the end} that holiday feeling. Free. Relaxed. Calm. Effortless. Able. Light.

And I've noticed when something {anything} changes in life there's something to be learnt. I'm so sure of that.

Because when change meant having to do things differently, I learnt to adapt.

And when change required having to ask for a hand, I learnt to accept help {with thanks}.

Change has meant living with and without {things, people, opportunities, work, time}, and learning to cope just the same.

Change has meant viewing and doing things differently, and learning to let go of old patterns and ways of thinking too.

But mostly I've learnt that change brings an opportunity to change {grow, learn, empower, understand}. And that no matter how big change is, there is always {always} a way to overcome change {in the end}.

xx

{Grateful for change ~ This past week I've been welcoming change, giving thanks for change, and loving what change has {eventually} brought our way. Because this year I've {we've} conquered so very much of it.}

{Linking with gratitude to Maxabella and Kidspot's 52 Weeks of Grateful}

Has this year seen any big changes for you? And are you grateful for change?

　

Hopes, dreams, changes and goals

I had big hopes for May, perhaps too big. I thought it would herald loads of changes, and to some extent it has. But I'll admit I was hoping for something extra magical, for a bolder-than-before kind of change...

Instead, I made changes. I stopped waiting for change. And {with Grace & Eve by my side} started living the dreams I'd been having of three of us sharing, loving and witnessing the world together.

And this month began a little sky obsession {photo documented on instagram}. I can't help but look to the sky each morning, and in the middle of the day and night-time too. Sometimes the three of us sit outside and stare at the clouds {and search for the day-time moon}.

But mainly I'm looking to the sky in the morning. I look up and wonder what the day will bring, and {due to a little miss I-love-to-rise-before-the-sun} I find myself stealing glances out a dark window in the early mornings waiting for {and wondering about} the time when the night-sky will dance with the new day.

I'm making June about journalling and setting goals. I've got so many ideas running around in this mind of mine, and so many hopes {and wishes too}. But what I need is clarity.

With two little girls keeping me busy, it feels like I've had no time to stop. And in a way, I think I've been biding my time... But {with my journal and pen by my side} I'm ready to set some goals, and I'll be keeping happiness and gratitude close to my heart as I do.

Elisa xx

{My favourites of the images I've taken in May - you can see the rest on the With Grace & Eve Facebook page or via instagram @withgraceandeve}

Are you a goal-setter? And do you journal?

What are you waiting for?

 

 

 It's only just struck me that I'm waiting.

I have been waiting.

I wait. And I do it really well.

I thought I was the resident live-in-the-now make-the-most-of-today optimist in this home.

Well, to some extent I am all that, but it turns out I'm also loving life in a comfort zone, waiting for another chance, the perfect time, for things to look brighter, for life to give me another sign before I make a change.

I'm not happy about this revelation. I don't want to be Mrs Wait.

Because waiting for me, isn't really waiting at all. It's putting things off, it's casting things aside, it's about keeping things safe and simple.

Time for this mama to step up, step outside, face her fears, and live more fully. I may go slowly, but I will go, one little step one moment at a time.

Elisa xx

{Some things are worth waiting for, but this kind of waiting isn't really waiting. It's fear. I first acknowledged this almost two months ago after being asked, "What are you waiting for?" on hitting the publish button on this blog. I had no answer. I was just waiting, because waiting was comfortable. And waiting was fear of the unknown, and fear of not being good enough. Just plain old fear gift-wrapped as waiting. And that's when I realised this kind of waiting is what keeps dreams forever dreams, and wishes forever wishes.}

{I've recently enrolled little miss two in music and movement classes - she loves it! And I've headed back to pilates, and hopefully soon yoga too. We've stopped waiting for a better time... we're making now our time. It feels good.}

{image via}

Do you prefer to play things safe and stick to your comfort zone? Or do you make changes and try things new?

On the eve of something new

 

In two days I turn 30. Thirty. Thirt-eeee.

I keep rolling the word around on my tongue. And it gets a little stuck.

I thought my feelings were neither here nor there about 3-0.

But I do feel something.  

It feels like I'm on the eve of something new.

Like on a humid and hot day, when you step outside and feel a cool breeze sweep past you. 30 feels like that. Refreshing. Like a change is coming.

I think {hope} 30 will be lighter, brighter and full of new opportunities.

I think {hope} 30 will see a better {bolder, balanced, blissful} me come to the surface.

So I bid an early goodbye to my twenties and I say thank you {for all the lessons, for the births of my girls, for showing me I am supported, for teaching me what balanced and healthy is, for introducing me to meditation and reconnecting me with that place inside where my spirit resides}

And with a gentle smile, I say a big hello and offer a wondrous welcome to 30. Life feels good.

Elisa xx

{I chose this image because it symbolises the best part of my twenties - being able to welcome two beautiful healthy babies into the world. But also, it's taken at the beach - one of my favourite places to be. Image by Sam Natoli Photography}

When were you last on the eve of something new?